Category Archives: Just Sayin’

Stating the obvious. Just Sayin.

Me last night: “ugh I’m sick… everything hurts.”  Spends night coughing on sofa.

Drags through morning to drop Jr off at school, stops to buy out cold aisle at Walgreens.
Lays down on sofa and falls asleep in feverish heap of tissues, zinc, and Dayquil as husband leaves house.

The Mr, upon returning to find me in same feverish heap:  “Oh, are you sick ?”

Sigh.
Really?

Just Sayin.

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Put the liners down, ma’am. Just Sayin’.

Let’s say your dog scratches hell out of the leather sofa (more to come on that, because BELIEVE when I say I have some lessons learned about it,) and you are tasked with dealing with that situation.

Let’s also say you are on your second trip in one day to the store for various leather treatment/color/conditioning supplies. It MIGHT be best to just concentrate on selecting and purchasing those supplies, and not grabbing anything else you might be needing outside of that task.

BUT – if you decide to grab said other things, at least do it AFTER you have selected the leather supplies, or you might find yourself deep in thought in front of the shoe polish, absentmindedly tapping a box of panty (cringe) liners up against your chin. You might also be so startled when a clerk asks if you need help finding anything, that you gesture wildly in the direction of the polishes with said liners while explaining your lack of “cordovan polish” understanding.
If all this happens, it will NOT result in the answers you seek.
Just sayin’.

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Burning Question – Underwear

Queue the trumpets, because I am introducing a new feature here on Reluctantly Suburban!!
Here’s the thing: in the day-to-day of Keriness, I confess that a lot of time is taken up with the mundane..
Things like “check for food in teeth,” and “concentrate walking because when you don’t you trip on stuff,” and of course “check for pants before leaving house” (for both Jr and myself, because let’s face it, #momlife ain’t always easy, yo.)
But somehow, even with all of those ridiculous high-level thoughts taking up so much space in the brain, there is still room in there for questions.  Questions that get trapped and grow from passing thoughts to ginormous wonderings.
Important ? Goodness no, hardly ever.
But still – Keri’s gotta know.
So I give you, KERI’S BURNING QUESTIONS!! ::::fireworks, glitter-bombs, jazz hands!!!:::::

Let’s dive right in with one that has eaten at me for an embarrassing length of time:

Underwear: singular or plural?

When I talk about underwear (which is my preferred moniker for the pantalones worn under the outers, if you will, since I am a hater of the word panties er… the p- word,) I always use plural pronouns.
For example “Have you seen my pink underwear? I put them in with your sheets, and I can’t find them now.”
BUT – I often hear folks, especially TV characters, use singular pronouns, i.e.: “That’s my underwear and you can’t borrow it!”
It? IT?
No… it should be “them” shouldn’t it?

It eats at me people. I mean, aren’t they really just underpants? And pants is plural. Right?
So there you go – round 1 of Keri’s Burning Questions.
See that comment section down there? Chime in. I gotta know.

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There’s always time for a freakout. Just Sayin’.

You know, one minute you’re in your early-ish 30s, and you think you have everything under control or whatever… Then in the blink of a damn (wrinkly) eye,  you’re 39 and barreling toward the on-ramp of 40, and you’re at the Sephora with these under eye bags you could use to pack for a two month cruise –  begging “Help me Guillermo, HELP ME!” while shaking the makeup artist by the shoulders, and you realize that shit is getting REAL, yo!

Seriously. Fix it, Guillermo.

Fix. It.

Just sayin’.

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Perky? Jerky. Just Sayin’.

Oh hey there, extremely chipper coworker.

Why yes, it IS my first day back in the office after our holiday trip.

“Isn’t it good to be home,”  you ask?

Actually, the flight was delayed so we were uber late getting in, half my department seems to have blown up in time it took that plane to get back here, my suitcase is still sitting where it exploded all over the living room last night so I could find Jr’s special new toy he HAD TO sleep with, oh and evidently I haven’t even a prayer of wrapping up a bunch of random year end stuff I didn’t know existed until now.

So I am going to need you to take the perky from a 10 to a 2, ASAP, or I’m going to send a photocopy of my tush to everyone in the office and sign it “Happy Moon Year!” with your name.

K?

Just Sayin’.

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