Hello 2016! I am sure you are full of all the promise and potential that anyone could possibly hope for, and you and I will get to all of that, pinky swear. (I confess, sitting here on the first Monday back to work after a whole boatload of holiday fun and frolic, you are fairly well disguised as a big fat bummer right now. But I know, it’s me – not you. We will get over the hump.)
I have to say, as we all start into a new year, whether with a spark or a sputter, one trend this year has me super unimpressed.
What is with the backlash against resolutions this year?
When did setting goals at time of year so traditional for new beginnings become so downright terrible? The blogosphere is overloaded with messages about how failure is certain and change won’t happen. Or worse, that choosing to set goals (especially, it seems, at this time of year,) somehow equals a lack of self-acceptance.
Here’s the thing about goal setting – OF COURSE it can happen any time. But January 1st (or 4th,) is just as good a time as any to start. ANDPLUSALSO – you may find that you have to start again, maybe even several times. Doing so down the road isn’t failure, it’s forward motion.
Don’t want to set goals/resolutions this year (or ever?) Fantastic, then don’t. No shame in that game, for sure.
But the seeming campaign against those who do choose to? It is weird as hell to me.
I do tend to reassess and determine if there are changes I would like to be making around the beginning of the year, and then again around my birthday which happens to be in June. It makes for a nice 6 month cycle, and I find both a great opportunity for self-reflection.
Additionally, I have a record of big and small successes under my belt in the “resolution” department, so I don’t buy into the whole “you can’t change over night,” or “setting yourself up to fail” arguments. The truth is, you can do whatever the hell you want, and you can succeed – eventually – if you get started.
If January 1 is the day you start, then wild applause to you!!
Last year I did indeed successfully lose the weight I had been carrying around since Jr was born. Started on January 1st. Didn’t fail. The year before that I set a really specific financial goal that was put into motion on January 1st. By mid June that goal was accomplished. Didn’t fail. Years ago, January 1st saw my first day on a nicotine patch after MANY years of smoking. Guess what? Didn’t fail. 10 years ago, I was one of the people that long-standing gym members complain about who chose January 1st as day 1 of her shiny new gym membership. I loved going to the gym 3-5 times a week for the next 5 years, until prego Keri decided she liked working out at home better. Didn’t. Fail.
Honestly, I bet if I sat and thought, I HAVE failed/not continued goals that I set around the start of New Years in the past. It isn’t anything I am dwelling on, because I fail at things on the regular. You can’t get up to all the nutty new ideas I have and not fail at things. But the successes are what stick in my mind, and in my self-esteem bank, especially this time of year.
I confess that this year, my goal may seem less lofty than some – but it is extremely intentional based on what this next year will bring.
In this year of Jr going from preschooler to kindergartner, and my parents setting their sights on retirement adventures near and far, and The Mr and I so seriously reassessing what we want our family’s future to look like – this year my goal is to “make it work.” Whatever comes, whatever shapes up, pans out, and comes at us. Make. It. Work.
Furthermore, make it work well. Accept, adapt, and drive on. This is a HUGE opportunity for growth on my part, as I have been known to worry, micromanage, and panic… Fret is a skill I have too finely honed.
Do I feel doomed to failure because I dare to call this a resolution and put a plan of action into place at the start of a fresh new year?
Of course not.
Neither should you.