Reason number 427 why it’s probably better if I don’t venture out in public:
I am at the office today.
I had breakfast at least an hour ago.
In the restroom I just discovered that my scarf is adorned with a sizable chunk of turkey bacon.
Alas, the shock-fashion value of meat wear doesn’t translate from Lady Gaga’s red carpet antics to my row of cubicles.
I’m a debacle.